Xmas is over. The new year is about to begin

Well here I am on my own. going down the only road I have ever known.
The xmas beast has almost been devoured, the chocolates now stain furniture. presents have been opened.
I have recieved more alcohol which is always good. Work has not called AT ALL which is a fucking miracle.
Xmas is over and it has been a good one i have been pleasntly full, pleasantly drunk, and pleasntly free of hangovers.

And now it is time for the new year.
let the binge drinking commence

Dear santa

One of my jobs at Xmas is dealing with Xmas letter overflow from our Lapland operation.
Here is one of them.

Dear Santa
My Christmas list this year is for boosted profits for Halliburton and my ascendancy to president. Also I would like that little plame affair to go away and to torture whomever I please.

Yours Dick Cheney

To: Charlie
From: Santa
Cc:
Tell this guy to fuck off. He is definitely on my winter shit list.
Can we have him killed?

To: Santa
From: Charlie
Cc:
No we cannot have him killed. It a federal offence to even say it. But we can however ensure his Xmas gift is a steaming pile of shit and perhaps an impeachment.

To: Charlie
From: Santa
Cc:
Ok I want you to de-prioritise your current items and make this your primary action item. I will send to my elves one of my steaming turds and you sort out the delivery.

Result.

Inner peace

Something I should bring to you.I am passing this on to you because it definitely worked for me, and
we could all do with a little calm.

By following the simple advice I read in an article, I have finally
found inner peace.

The article read: "The way to achieve inner peace is to finish off
all the things you have started".

So I looked round the house to see all the things I had started and
hadn't finished.

And before leaving the house this morning I finished off a bottle of
red wine, a bottle of white wine, Baileys, three Bacardi Breezers,
Jack Daniels, Prozac, some Valium, some cheesecake and a box of
chocolates.

You have no idea how bloody good I feel.

You must pass this on to those you feel are in need of inner peace.

Bloggers block

I have to admit of recent my blog has been faltering I seem to lack focus at the moment being preoccupied with other things.
And when I come to sit down and write something nothing pops into my head, no witticisms, no political point’s, no observation on the human condition. I am to say the least a little blank in my head. So I have decided to write about the fact that i cannot seem to write anything of interest at the moment. This means i am already running out of things to write down.

Jimmy Carr had a good joke about writing a book about asking your woman if she liked anal sex it was entitled. What if she takes it the wrong way?

I feel I must somehow upgrade, or up my blogging game. But I do not know how, and have no idea what I mean by upping my game.

This is turning into a series of statements.

I think my current lack of blogging subjects is due to me not reading enough. Usually I read something that pisses me off, and then I write about it, but at the moment nothing perhaps Xmas cheer has infiltrated my brain rendering it fuzzy, and unable to think bad and pissed of thoughts. They say in paradise there would be no writers as with no injustice intolerance or war there would be nothing to really write about. I know the world is a steaming pile of poo at the moment but this Xmas brain fuzz is distorting everything. More human rights violations in countries I have never been to? Come on then despots show some Xmas spirit- oh your Muslim? My bad ho ho ho.
Maybe when they electrocute somebody who has been renditioned they can use Xmas lights instead ho ho ho!
I think my dissatisfaction is returning my glee at bush's and Blair’s failures gaining strength the Xmas fuzz is lifting!

Yes I maybe busy and full of kindness to my fellow man but some of those men are going to get my special Xmas boot up their ass!

Ho! Fucking ho!

Weight

It may be the season of giving but it is also the season for eating, already I am preparing my post Xmas exercises regimen.
What an odd thing to do. I have gotten better as I now eat less at this time of year, much more discipline. But still a lot of food and booze will be consumed.
I will consume chocolate, turkey, whiskey, more whiskey and cake. To get the weight off, I will run, cycle, and do weight lifting. An irony. To lose weight I will lift it, perhaps I should attach the turkeys, puddings etc instead of the weights.

I wish Christmas was less about consumption and more about having fun. Now I love a good meal, well prepared and with all the trimmings, where you eat until you are pleasantly full. But to often however we confuse eating and drinking excessively with a good time.

Back to the preparations

Computer bollocks

I love computers as much as i hate them. When they do what i want all is well, when they do not, well you know the story.
Much has changed since computers came into the home. But much has not. Most issues still require a long and tedious check
of everything, because you never know that by putting just one thing in caps,you can alter everything. You can run BITE etc but they only look for things that do not work. If you in your stupidity have altered something but it still works(mostly) you can be in trouble. Its a bit like if you wrote: I wander what time it is. If you ran that through spell check no issues. But you know it is the word wonder rather than wander (A note to everyone always proof read docs)

I have done this today on a very complicated bit of kit - got to get it fixed or I am in the shit.
Timtom (sc) has not noticed yet. Thankfully he knows nothing about this bit of kit , so he will not put his nose in.
Merry xmas fuckup!

Surfboards

Surfboards are dangerous and that is a fact. Turns out the foam they use inside, has various chemicals that are just not good for you(allegedly). And I thought surfers just had to worry about wiping out and the occasional shark. I wonder if this will make it a dangerous sport.

It seems strange that Clark, who made the surfboard blanks could have modernised. But the changes would have been too costly for him he alleged. He is also subject to lawsuits.
So I guess they will be made in countries that have few laws concerning the health of the employee.
And the lawsuits will rumble on leaving only one winner. The lawyer.

The Health NAZI was quite upset
Timtom (sc) tried to be cool by being upset by it


HO HO HO - Xmas cheer

Endless wars

I read 1984 again. Each time I do it sends a shiver down my Spine.
We have the ministry of truth that tells only lies. WMD e.t.c via the spin-doctors, which do things beyond what Orwell could ever have imagined in the history of propaganda and disinformation.

We have the ministry of peace that only deals with war: can anyone remember when we have not been at war with someone?
I do not.

We have the ministry of love, MI6, CIA all ready to provide more truth and special renditions for those who are uncooperative.

We do not have a ministry of plenty, or none that can be recognised as such but perhaps the G8 summits are enough. I have lots but with each day that passes a lot more people have less. And what I have does not really make me happy.

And lets not forget the cameras and observation that permeates everything. From walking on the street to being at work you are being monitored continually.
The media employ Newspeak more and more, a simplification that extends across all popular mediums.

Doubleplus ungood

Management techniques

My most anger filled moments are at work dealing with Tom-tom (sc).
When I first met Tom-tom (sc) I though he was a nice guy. I tried to get on with him and do my best to complete my duties.
But it soon came apparent that no matter what I did, it would not be enough. This is because he is an asshole.
A common complaint, and anyone who has been in any kind of work environment can relate. He is an asshole due to a complete lack of social skills, and in inability to motivate others. Most of these things of course come down from the "top" from a superior’s whose abilities are so lacking I often wonder how they get there. Tom-tom (sc) an asshole of the highest order likes to motivate people by continual threats of being "out placed" This is generally the only skill he seems to possess and I often wonder if he is capable of anything else.
Tom-tom (sc) and myself go on lots of managerial, team building and other exercises that are mostly useless.
This due to the management ethos of if you do not like it you can always leave, or we can outplace you techniques.
So all of those management courses should be replaced with firing people or making their lives a misery101.

We have meetings to find out "why do people leave the company" of which I am always tempted to say "because we are cunts to them" of course I have learned along time ago to say anything truthful or negative WILL cost me my job. So I put forward positive ideas that of course they love as none of them actually involve doing anything or spending money.

Ho hum

Brain3

My head is as empty as president Bush's head.
I only wish it was as full as cheney's bank account

Brain2

My brain is as empty as president Bush's head, in his second term.

Brain

My brain is as empty as president bush's.
So not much today

Insomnia

I have terrible insomnia. Nothing is worse than doing the night watch. I call it the long dark teatime of the soul as at 4am in the morning you find yourself in a twilight world. It feels like I am on another planet one where the natural laws do not apply. Gravity can become heavier or lighter, and dogs put on suits and talk.
I watch TV that does return some normality, and you can find some really good shows and movies. But it is no substitute for a good nights sleep. Some people like my health Nazi neighbour says what’s so bad about it. Go for a run. What the fuck does he know? You live with it for a few weeks see how far you get.

I will now try to get some sleeeeep.

Religious differences

I have had thought

When Christians get angry they kill a bunch of people

When Muslims get angry they kill themselves and a bunch of people

When Buddhists get angry they kill themselves

If we were all Buddhists the world would be a safer place. Osama bin laden and George bush could settle the war on terror by killing themselves.
Suicide bombers would erect a cordon around the blast area offer tofu and then blow themselves up, the police watching to ensure the safety of all.

Man sues over faulty XBOX360

Now this is a strange one a man is taking MS to court because his console crashes because it overheats.
I seem to remember things come with warranties. Now I am not keen on MS and the way it does business, but still it has only been 10 days since its release, it would be like buying a coffee, deciding it was not warm enough, and then taking court action 10 seconds later.
Of course I am suspicious of his motives, the console wars are hard and bitter, and it would not surprise me if there were other motives involved. But who knows. Maybe when he called them to report it, they were dismissive.
But my experience of MS and my Xbox problems were very good.

This does reflect our society in general. Companies do look upon us not only as consumers but also as potential litigants.
One only has to talk to a lawyer, and they will agree, that they must look upon clients as future problems, particularly if a case does not go the client’s way.

This is the viscous circle we live in today, companies look on us problems, we think all companies are trying to cheat us.
Lawyers make tons of cash .The law does not serve us but only serves itself just like everything else.

Time travel

I will be at some point in my future a time traveller. I have not gone back in time just yet, though at this moment I am going forward along with everyone else. Why am I going back in time? It is the only explanation I have for meeting people who say they have met me before. Such as those really nice calls I get from people who are selling me stuff.
"Hello Mr CH we called earlier about our go faster widget wiper time sharer and you asked us to call back another time"
"I did?"
Well all I can say is that either I am going senile and forgetting so much stuff nowadays, or I am travelling back in time taking those calls and re-arranging them. God I am a C$%T to myself.

Of course one begs the question why am I going back in time. Perhaps I really do need to make those purchases to prevent the world from ending, or some rightwing politician from invading other countries, imprisoning people without trial and say things like "The relations with, uhh — Europe are important relations, and they've, uhh — because, we do share values. And, they're universal values, they're not American values or, you know — European values, they're universal values. And those values — uhh — being universal, ought to be applied everywhere.

Oh shit. I knew I should have purchased that double-glazing.

Junk part2

Well I have gone through my stuff, and rooted out all the crap I do not want. some will be ruthlessly disposed of, and others will be sold on eBay.
Also while going through my junk I found some old books, one was by Philip k Dick, and while having a quick read I remembered a term PKD used to describe junk in the house. He called it kipple. Which is a good word.
So now I am selling stuff, so if you are looking for IRON CROWN ENTERPRISES books check out eBay now!
(As a side thought do they allow me to promote the stuff I am selling on Eblogger?)

I don't take a dump unless I have a plan

In a recent press release US President Bush has informed us that US troops will stay until the job is done.
Now when it came to invading I was not a supporter but now the coalition is in Iraq we cannot just walk away. And at least now he seems to be having an actual plan. This "plan" does seem to be sketchy but at least one exists.

When I think about the conflict in Iraq I look at previous wars, in particular the Second World War.
Why the second? In this war the allies knew what their plan was, to defeat Germany, but also what they were going to do after. First remove Hitler from power then occupy Germany as a whole, expunge all traces of the Nazi party. But there was one difference about WW2 that does separate it from modern conflicts. They had a plan of what they were going to do after the war was won; it was called the Marshall plan named after the general who created it. The plan was to rebuild Europe by restarting its economy and to rebuild Germany and prevent any allied claims to German assets. This was to prevent the same events occurring which led to WW2 oddly enough it was the failure to deal with the First world war that led to the second, like the first gulf war led to the current conflict.

But this current conflict is different from WW2 for one thing there is no defined battlefield, and no set victory conditions.
We know what we would like the outcome to be, but do not know the way to get there. This costs the US $6 billion a month.
And this is what concerns me the most, the running of this conflict seems ad hoc at best, the militaries are of course reasonably well run with a core of discipline. Politicians are its weakness unable to put through a long-term defined plan of action. Things are run on a reactionary basis, they never take the initiative, and only follow things if they are in the public eye. And in many cases seem more worried about the money they will make from it.
This is not the way to run any war.

Lets look at our enemy they are well run they know the course of action they are going to take, the leaders and the troops are of one kind, they do not react, they take the initative.
They know the weakness of our politicians, and how to play them. For example Spain and Italy, when terrible things happened they were too quick to back down (appeasement does not work WW2 again)
It should be said I do not think the terrorists can win this is not Vietnam, the insurgents in Iraq are not trying to make a country whole, and beyond defeating the coalition have no real plans afterwards.
But this is a weakness we should be exploiting, our ability to plan is better than theirs. But unless we start thinking this conflict will run on an on.

(4/12/05)
As an addition to this if you check out the military recruiter link there is a good post about what has been done in iraq.
And offers a different perspective.

Junk

Over the years I have had to fight a genetically inherited disorder called junkitis. I collect crap, reams of crap, endless mostly useless crap. There are things which I possess and store which were packed away in roman times. Issues of pc magazines when 3dfx cards were king of the silicon hill, books on technology outdated since the seventies. I tell myself that this stuff may be valuable. But whom am I kidding?
I remember my grandfather storing stuff such as bolts, nuts, and an electric motor,which was used in a bizarre attempt to create better ventilation for a fireplace. It was used only once, as it did not work, then stored in the shed for twenty years, kept in the vague hope it might actually be used again. It never was.
Why do I have this affliction? Is there a cure? I keep this stuff in the vain hope it may prove useful but it never does. Even things, which were useful, are kept way beyond the use by date (I do not mean food)
I know I am afflicted; I go to my junkoholics anonymous group stand up and say, "my name is Charlie and I collect junk"
Tomorrow I have an unenviable job, as I must go junk cold turkey I must remove things and GET RID OF THEM. You will say "you have to do it!' but asking me to get rid of my stuff feels like cutting chunks off my flesh.
I am told this is a symptom of the consumer age and my freeloading spiritualist says it holds me back from true happiness.
I guess he is right, it can get to the point were instead of possessing things they begin to possess you. I have now decided that when I get something new, I must now get rid of something old to balance things out.
Peace and inner tranquillity beckons.

Blowing shit up

Recently it has revealed that Al jazzera was considered to be such a threat that bush wanted to bomb it and Tony Blair managed to convince him not to.
What is it with bush? Why is he so scared? So because Al jazeera provides a differing opinion it must be destroyed?
Are we so unsure of our own message that the only way we can put it across is to destroy conflicting opinion?
They say it is because al jazerra supports Osama bin laden yet at the same time al zaqawi the terrorist who operates in Iraq accuse's them of supporting the west.
And here is the issue destroy al jazeera and we may be denying the only voice in the Arab world, which provides a (mostly) neutral voice. You could provide a substitute but who in the Arab world would believe it.
And lets not forget our own press, they are not exactly free of agenda and in may ways are more dangerous, after all in the Arab countries you can get CNN sky news etc, yet you cannot as far as in know get al jazeera in the west.
So the Arab world is in fact getting a broader range of news perspectives than we are (unless you are in Saudi Arabia and Iraq then you cannot legally get al jazzera)
In the end it seems that we in west dislike this station because it is not the western news. We would never consider bombing the BBC for some of its news stories and I find a lot of them to be very anti bush and Blair. And what about fox news they are the opposite no booms for them.
I am not to keen on any of the press as I have written in earlier posts but i do not try to silence them.

The new Cathedrals

Yesterday I went to a place as an unbeliever and came out a devotee of a new faith.
Yes sir I believe, so what is this new rapture what religion has taken my soul where others have failed?
It began when I parked and walked with others on what turned out to be a religious pilgrimage.
I entered into a magnificent building of wondrous sights. It was full of majesty and awe. All people Jews, Muslims, Christians and Buddhists united under one clear message. I was astounded I went from place to place finally I found a place were I was to make my offering I gave it to the women she smiled all understanding and I was filled with joy I offered her my mark and she said "would you like our club card?" I declined.

Yes shopping at the mall is the new religious experience. You doubt me? What other large building do you go to on such a regular basis and with such devotion? Even the most irreligious man makes this journey. I know people who hate shopping yet they still make it, try getting them to something with any kind of spiritual dimension and you will not see them for dust.

But the mall the mall oh here its name and rejoice! . The devil of course has nothing to do with it (though you do have to show his mark or as we call it the credit card) he has been shoved aside by Mammon who beams down on you as long you have money or really good credit.

This of course leads to Christmas, yes Christ mass the time of year when Christianity herald's the birth of its savoir. But I doubt at any time we will actually go to a religious service. In fact if you go to any mall it will look great, loads of decorations and lights but if you really look at them not one religious symbol can actually be seen. This is because the new religion Does not tolerate any religion buts its own. Christmas is not a religious holiday but a winter celebration. Some see this as political correctness gone mad but for the new religion its fine as all faiths can take part in a winter celebration. Mammon loves it that way.

Yes the mall is the new cathedral in the past for a place to call itself a city it had to have one now every city is not complete unless it has a mall.

Happy (non religous or in any way spirtual) holidays!

Hackers attacking blogs

First of all an apology to hackers there is a difference to what a hackers does; which is write code. And shitheads who despoil someone’s blog, by erasing it or changing it etc. Strictly speaking these people are crackers. Now some crack websites and systems for the challenge it provides and I do not object to that. I chortle when they replace some government asshole site with an alternative.
But why do this on a blog? After all a blog allows people to put what they say onto the Internet, you object to a comment, make a comment yourself the power is there for you to do it. But when you remove someone’s right to talk you also remove that right for you to reply.

Indiana jones

Recently while on the web at work, I clicked onto a link by accident, and was taken to page that I had not seen for several years. It was exactly the same as I had last seen it. That last post which said he would be back soon to finish off was still there the work uncompleted. Reading the text again I felt nostalgic; the old typeset and layout stuck it firmly in the mid nineties. And then a thought occurred to me, I am Indiana Jones! Instead of going through thick jungles and exploring lost ruins, the Internet had become the vast sands of Egypt, or the heights of the Khyber Pass. With ancient places for me to visit were hidden texts of lore are waiting for me. And so deciding not to do any more work that day I looked for similar places, some were gone, others ravaged or replaced in some only dead links remained. But I persisted and slowly old sites from my early surfing came back. Such as the Traveller web ring for people who used to play with pen paper and dice, before computers eradicated the old geek pastimes and replaced them.
Some of them are endearing like old friends, some could not be read at all due to strange background and text colours.
Others were just terrible. A lot of them had just the one page, the Webmaster never returning some with the under construction banner still there 7-8 years later (why are they still here? is there an internet version of the elephant dying grounds?)

Perhaps in years to come students will get honours in computing archaeology sifting through ancient data for how people in the past lived . Being a blogger it got me to thinking would I be the Samuel Pepes of the 21century or will I be forgotten. Or will they think oh god its that everyday is like Sunday wanker again.

From SONY to SORRY the customer as the enemy

Recently Sony has been a very bad boy indeed using something called XCP protection on its CD's (Philips who owns the CD tech has now asked Sony not to use the CD title)
XCP is a DRM technology which when you put it into your PC changes registry settings and puts in programs which prevent this tampering from being noticed. This is to prevent the music being copied and any other music CD's from being copied.

Fortunately if you used any software that detected viruses and other tampering it could be removed so you are safe right? . No in doing so it also removed the registry settings concerning your DVD or CD writer, thus preventing the copy functions and in some cases the player stopped working.

It gets worse. Now that the hackers know about it they are now using the same tech to infect other machines with Trojans and prevent detection of these programs.
And it does not end there Sony released a patch to fix this problem however the cure is worse than the disease as security companies say to use it will actually make you computer more Vulnerable.
It has now been discovered it also put a phone home system to report back what you have been up to!
In fact security experts used this same feature to detect who is infected and the result is a minimum of half a million computers are affected and up to half the worlds networks have at least one computer with this problem. Joy. If I was to create a program that did the above I would be in serious trouble but as yet Sony has suffered no legal comeback at all.
And this is not the end Sony has also put a patent on a system which will prevent you from playing your CD or DVD on anything but your own equipment. This bit of tech will be for the future but I wonder will they tell us about it?
I do not think so.

And when did all this begin? Why is it that company’s look upon their customers as enemies? I may be overreacting but am I?
I have no objection to them protecting themselves from organised gangs they are a business and have the right to protection.
But now they seem to think everyone is fair game old ladies the young and the poor. I mention these, as when the corporations wield their legal cudgel it is these people who suffer. They have to make a deal because they cannot afford the court case, guilt is practically guaranteed they must deal if they do not want a long legal case, and even if they win the legal costs can be staggering true they can sue but this process can take years with appeals etc and for the company lawyers this is their job they go home that’s it, the old lady or the poor person cannot they take it home with them and it dominates their lives.

This process of turning the customer into the enemy begins with terminology .We are now no longer customers but consumers. So what does that mean? A customer indicates some form of relationship with the seller a social contract is a term you might use. This means the exchange of money and goods is not just about that exchange but also about respect for the person and making them a human being. Consumer is like the phrase "collateral damage" it desensitises us. Makes it more acceptable to do these things, as we no longer perceive the "consumer" as a person. This extends also to the legal documents enclosed with our products and in our EULAS on software. If you actually look at them they are draconian. This again reaffirms their view of us as the enemy as it seems they are not so much a legal document but terms of surrender.

So how does one fight back? By the legal means possible but you must have deep pockets or rich friends. By calling your elected official? Perhaps if they think it might be a vote winner, but the companies contribute to the political parties and offer hard cash. Or really good directorships for when they leave politics.

In the end the best way to fight back is not to buy. As one thing I have learned is screwing with someone’s cash
Always gets a response.

I would like to add before I posted this sony was already subject to litigation in NY State and California

Guns "r" us

The Internet has really fed my need for toys of all descriptions with the military toys a guilty pleasure.
Why guilty? I am not Pro war so it is contradictory that I enjoy reading about them and watching them so much. But as they say "the duality of man". Here is a selection that should be in everyone’s collection even if they did break every known law.

Automat Kalashnikov 47
Everyone knows this one, even my grandmother. After all it is the granddaddy of all small arms you can keep your M16a2 your FAMAS and g36k’s. This is the only one that has really mattered in the small arms field recommended by the Russian army and every guerrilla army there has been, with particular praise from the NVA. From its wooden stock distinctive sound and banana magazine this is a design classic.

UZI
Cause i'm an Uzi lover (should be sung to the tune easy lover)

B52 bomber
Since watching Kubrick’s film Dr strange glove this monstrosity of the sky has always had a special place in my heart.
From its eight engines to its 70,000lb bomb capacity who cannot love the BUFF

AH64 Apache
It has FLIR and radar, guns, dumb rockets and smart ones and probably sharp sticks what does this thing not have?

G5 howitzer
Designed by the ultimate gun nut Dr Gerald "super gun" bull this also comes in a Self Propelled G6 version that has freakin huge wheels. Considered to be the best artillery piece in the world it can hurl a projectile up to 54km

T72 tank
There are better tanks now but when this one came out NATO soiled itself fast manoeuvrable with a good punch and a low profile. This came from the long experience Russia has with tanks (kursk anyone?)

B2 stealth bomber
This radar sneaky aircraft is the ultimate in deeeep penetration and it looks good to boot. Having seen it myself I am always amazed at how big it is, and how small it looks. This is the silent fellow who says nothing but when he does watch out.

Nuclear weapons
The one weapon in the world that people speak about in hushed tones from the Davy Crockett tactical nuclear weapon: variable yield 0.01-1 k to the Tsar Bomba device: 50 Mt — USSR, largest yield explosive device ever, mass of 27 short tons (24 metric tons), in its "full" form it would have been 100 Mt. The reverence people have for these borders on the religious Oppenhiemer got it right when he quoted "and lo I have become death the devourer of worlds"

News news news

When I watch the news, read the paper or surf the Internet one thing that always fills me with pity is the poor politician being interviewed. Why do I pity him because more often than not the same thing happens. Jornalist asks a question the politician knowing to give an answer would be suicide gives the party line. Journalist snorts.

Sometimes the question asked is actually valid but more and more the questions seem to be less about issues that are of importance and more about things that are of no relevance at all. Did you inhale drugs at a party so long ago that a lot of your voters were not even born? Now the press would say this is valid as he may be the next leader. And once I would have agreed with them. But as time passes these seem to be less about political debate and more about points scoring. They will stop pursuing this only when people get bored of it not when it actually reaches some valid political or moral point.
They say politics is the ultimate popularity contest I disagree the media hold this distinction as they rely on us the voters for their income via advertising.

And lets not forget the media is not as independent as it used to be most are owned by large corporations who in many cases do interfere in what is considered "newsworthy" (apart from perhaps the BBC but after the Dr Kelly whitewash And "reforms" I am unsure). They do not outright lie but they do set the agenda on what to report on.
In fact when I look at what is in the media today not only do I doubt the politician but also the newsreader. In some cases this bias is pronounced if not celebrated for example fox news is undoubtedly right leaning and they make no great effort to hide this and seem to be proud to say it (which I find to be refreshing as much as I disagree with them)
But the big problem is with news channels that do seem to be unbiased, for how can I tell that they are?
And this is my problem, doubt about not only the politician but with the media who presents it .I am to say the least in a pickle. But this if anything was the reason I started blogging I can read people opinions knowing they are biased and then make corrections.

Alienated

One of the many joys of the WWW is the amount of conspiracy theories there are. Wonderful bits of pure fiction (or are they?)
All speak the truth IN LARGE CAPITAL LETTERS when they want to make a point that they and only they have the truth.
Some are amusing some are quite disturbing (not because I think they are true) and some actually made me think until I remembered that none of them could actually PROVE anything.
Here are some of my favourites

Nazis at the South Pole.
Yep your favourite bad guys of countless films, those little BUGGERS are harder to get rid of than roaches.
Turns out they have been hiding down in base 212 building flying saucers and stealing livestock.

Atlantis at the South Pole.
I can see land prices rising fast in the cold continent so BE quick. Of course you will have to share it with Nazis SG1 and the shoggoth.

Elvis lives!
I have no problem with this. (Is this a conspiracy theory or religious devotion?)

Who killed JFk?
My favourite one is that someone hired an assassin who waited on the grassy knoll, was about to take the shot but was beaten to the punch by Oswald. The assassin took the money for the hit and buggered off. But when Oswald was arrested the people who arranged for the killing thought their man had been caught (they did not know his identity for obvious reasons) and arranged for ruby to kill him never realising their mistake, and then created a BIG problem for them.

UFO's
They come in all shape and sizes from massive vessels to teeny weenie ones. And they can be piloted from Nazis to aliens from Sirius. Main habits include stealing livestock genitals and buggering people with probes. All of course covered up By MAJ12 and the MEN in black.

Abductions
Why abduct people and bugger them? These beings can traverse the cosmos at velocities that defy physics. Can defy gravity and read our minds yet their medical technology is limited to anal PROBING, have they never heard of MRI scans?

Roswell
The granddaddy of all theories it is now impossible to determine the TRUTH about this one. Even if you did present what really happened no one would believe it.

I like the Nazi theories the best just so much more PLAUSABLE. Controlling us ALL via implants from their Antarctic base as they carry out occult practices.
And lets not forget maybe they are controlling me so you will look at the above theories and think they are all crap because I think (Am I?) they are.

What have i got to worry about?

I was reading the register yesterday about national security letters the FBI has been using in furthering investigations into possible terrorists.
A national security letter allows the FBI to gain info held on computer or paper files without warrant (it does not allow wiretaps) this means anything you do on a computer in your bank etc can be inspected. This is done without your knowledge.
All they do is go to your ISP, bank or even library and they have to give it with no questions asked. The ISP, bank ETC cannot tell you about it and the FBI does not have to explain at all why they want this info. Bush to say the least and his family are not beyond reproach. So are these things really going to be used wisely or are they going to be used with less beneficial motives? It should be said these letters have been around since the 70's at least and no one has complained (as far as I know) until they started sending them out in tens of thousands about 30,000 last year alone.
I got quite angry with this and then remembering my anger management training I calmed down had a good think about it. And then thought to my self, how does this affect me? Answer- it does not. When it comes down to it just will not affect me.

Or how about human rights violations in Russia .Do not like the Putin government- end up in prison or stepped on By OSNAZ.
By all accounts some guy called Stanislav Dmitrievski has been charged with offences that gave voice to Chechen leaders who wanted a peaceful resolution to the conflict. Again I got angry but then enhancing my calm I realised how does this affect me? Answer it does not. I do not know this person and if had not read amnesty international I would be blissful and calm.

Or how about the shake and bake fiasco? Troops used white phosphorus in Iraq to combat insurgents in falluja. Allegedly burning people to death or using the WP as a chemical weapon. I find this quite odd it's ok to shoot, blow up, and napalm somebody but using this WP which was used in the second world war by us with no complaints (unless you were on the other side) as some great sin. Again I got angry and again after thinking about it does this affect me. It does not.
It happens to people far away it does not and will not affect me.

All this news achieves is to get me angry for no real reason. I have no affect on these events, i do not know these people and they happen in places far away I have never heard off. They do not affect my job or my lifestyle in any way. Why do they insist on telling me these things which are of no use to me.
I have decided to read local papers only

Smart munitions

1-Radar detection is difficult because of the missile’s small size and low altitude flight, which ensure high probability of survival enroute to highly defended targets.
2-radar dectection is difficult because it never shows up on radar at all unless its speeding

1-It has become the combat proven “weapon of choice” for critical long-range, precision strike missions against high-value,heavily defended and politically sensitive targets.
2-It has become the combat proven “weapon of choice” for critical long-range, precision strike missions against high-value,heavily defended and politically sensitive targets.

1-utilizes highly integrated Global Positioning System and Inertial Navigation System (GPS/INS) guidance coupled with a digital scene matching system (DSMAC) and terrain contour matching (TERCOM) for highest end-game accuracy.GPS-only missions provide for very short mission planning response time.
2-Uses a map and watch

1-incorporates innovative technologies to provide new operational capabilities while dramatically reducing acquisition, operations and support costs.
2-lives with its mother

1-The strike controller can flex the missile inflight up to 15 preprogrammed alternative targets or redirect it to a new target. This targeting flexibility includes the ability to loiter over the battlefield awaiting an assignment to a time critical target. The missile can also transmit Battle Damage Indication (BDI) imagery and missile health and status messages via the satellite data link.
2-Has a mobile phone waits in a diner

1-Additionally, its modular design allows for easy integration of future payload candidates NBC
2-Additionally, its modular design allows for easy integration of future payload candidates NBC

1 -Is a cruise missile
2 -Is a suicide bomber

1-Costs about $600,000
2-Life is cheap

In the current war on terror thousands of cruise missiles have been launched. In fact so many have been used the military is worried it will not have enough for future conflicts, as they may not have the funding for future purchases. The terrorists will have as many as they need as long as our current policies on the middle east continue.

I have no problem that saddam is gone but the way it was done was screwed up.
In apocalypse now Kurtz asks willard "do you think my methods are unsound?'
willard replies" I dont see any method at all"

The inner hysteria

What is the inner hysteria?
This is the voice or feeling I get which says I do not have enough, I am not happy enough and I am not successful enough.

What does it feel like? -Panic

When do I feel it? When I look at my next-door neighbours Evo, when I see that loving couple. When some little S$%T get a promotion I know he did not deserve.

It does not matter if I do get better things than them, it will still not be enough. The inner hysteria is never full; its endless hunger can only be subdued never killed outright.

Retail therapy can keep it at bay I have learned to buy small things to keep it happy.

But it is consuming. And I am a consumer the endless barrage of adverts tell me I need more get rid of the old buy the new.
Get rid of the old buy the new. Get rid of the old buy the new .Get rid of the old buy the new. Get rid of the old buy the new. Get rid of the old buy the new. Get rid of the old buy the new. Get rid of the old buy the new. Get rid of the old buy the new. Get rid of the old buy the new.

Here’sssssss Johnny!

And lets not forget sexual thought. What do I mean by that. Sex is being sold to me everyday in clubs in the mall on TV in magazines. This is what I hate the most in advertising an endless parade of flesh and sexual innuendo .I am not prudish or religious but I look at the women and men in those adverts and they are too perfect in fact they are, computer enhanced and edited its no wonder so many people have confidence problems.

The worse thing about it is I am aware of this and still I buy things. And always there is the doubt that I am buying it not because my free will has chosen it but because the adverts have programmed me. I guess need the psychological equivalent of spy ware and adware removal so I can be sure of my "purchasing reality"

Nice

My first blog my first comment now what was this comment about ? doubts about my sanity? the fact that I do not take
enviromental concerns seriously?.
No my sin was to use the word "nice" and i have to admit looking at it now the comment was correct.

But i have a secret to tell the use of the word "nice" was to lure you all in to my trap to provoke debate and to get my blog noticed, and it worked! i will now create a blog called NICE to torment others with HAHAHAHAHA!

I will not edit the word nice out of my first blog i will keep it in. My red badge of courage to be "nice" i will however place a comment so everybody will say he knew he did wrong but fixed the problem rather than fixing the blame.

As Ned flanders would say Howdie doodie

I now have an anonymous way of spouting my monomaniacal delusions to the rest of an uninterested world.
I feel so empowered. Not.
Who am i? what do i want? where am i going,?and will george my dog stop humping my leg? and why does he only do that between the hours of 8 - 830pm?
I am not sorry if the above appears strange but this blog is going to be my toxic dumping ground for all the plain wierd s£$t my mind comes up with. A bit like dumping nuclear waste at sea or storing PCBs in third world countries. A safe way to vent my bowels on the idiots of the world with no legal comeback.

But first a little about mono-faceted me I am a good person with a good soul who's only purpose in life is to find peace, love, happiness, and the chance to be elected an MP and become seriously corrupt.

I would like a nice job where for once I would not have spend most of my time worrying about office politics, and actually get some work done rather than pleasing some little s$%t upstairs.

Where am i going? well as the saying goes "where ever you go. There you are"

Some may find my bleak visions depressing if you do i suggest the blogs saccahrinesweet and delusionalhappiness
but do not worry if we were ever to meet you would think i was a very nice- (the offending word) person.

I have had my first comment which concerned the word "nice" please read my next blog for my analysis.
my KPI's are not up to scratch.